Explore Generosity: Freeing Attachments
As I exited the interstate, I pulled up to a red light where a homeless vet stood swaying, holding a cardboard sign asking for money. I’ll often keep $5 gift cards to McDonalds in my wallet or blessing bags in my backseat for instances like this. I desire to offer help but ideally not financial because “he’ll probably buy booze”. But I didn’t have either and felt a pull to give him some money instead. I opened my wallet and found a $20 bill. Deciding that was more than I was willing to part with, I promptly skedaddled when the light turned green.
Soon thereafter I met with my therapist, who is also highly intuitive. He mentioned one of the areas that I’m holding myself back in relates to my (non-physical) attachment to money. I didn’t understand what he meant. The example he gave was: “It’s like giving a homeless person a $20 bill. You’re thinking of all of the reasons you shouldn’t give that much money to them (attachment) instead of just surrendering to what will be (non-attachment).” I was amazed because I hadn’t told him about the homeless vet.
To be clear, ‘non-attachment’ is not blasé, careless energy. It’s trustful surrender. My attachment to the $20 held judgmental assumptions rooted in fear of what the homeless veteran would do with my hard-earned money. Followed by justifying thoughts of the responsible ways I personally could use $20, like for paying bills. My unhealthy attachment prevented me from generously blessing a stranger and being blessed in return. In other words, if not dealt with, my unhealthy attachments will prevent me from living my most abundant life.
You may be thinking “that doesn’t resonate”, but this doesn’t mean you don’t have your own unhealthy attachments to process. They can manifest in many different ways.
I encourage you to examine your attachments to money by asking:
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Where do I feel resistance when it comes to generosity?
- My answer for the above scenario: I resist when I feel fear that the person I’m giving money to isn’t going to use it in a way that I believe is worthy. (Me struggling to relinquish control because to surrender means letting go of the ability to dictate how my money is used)
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How have my past experiences influenced my current attitudes towards giving?
- My answer for the above scenario: I find empty liquor bottles around my city and my ego tells me this is how my hard-earned money will be spent. (My ego always tries to keep me safe and uses past situations to inform the present. But I can’t let it override what my intuition tells me I should do – give the $20 away)
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What small step can I take to practice non-attachment today?
- My answer for the above scenario: The next time I feel intuitively drawn to help someone, I am willing to part with the resources I have on hand, surrendering control and fear, trusting they will be used for their and my highest good.
Use your best judgment when walking through this exercise. Of course nobody should give a clearly strung-out homeless person $20. Turn inwards and recognize when your intuition is telling you to act. Identifying and releasing your unhealthy attachments to money will allow abundance (including financial) to flow more freely into your life.
I’m here to meet you where you’re at if you ever wish to chat.
Katie Ubelhor, Accredited Financial Counselor
FinancialAlchemyCoaching@gmail.com
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